Deep Down Inside I Feel The Scream

I feel content. I'm enjoying this Thursday in which I didn't really have a lot to do. I like those days. I kind of enjoyed my chat with Mrs. Kelly. If there is something I've had trouble with over the years, its talking to former teachers. This year I'm not doing that bad of a job with it. I've already had conversations with Mr. Greenwald, Mrs. Katsionis(That also happened today), Mr. Forti, and Mrs. Kelly. I have to continue this ability to speak to people. It does really get you further in life.

And furthermore...
Fuck this bullshit:
-"I feel like we're gonna have a huge argument"
You only feel something like that if you want it. And that's all I'm gonna say about that load of bullshit.

Closing note: I want a guitar already!

Currently Listening to: Metallica - One

September

Current Rankings of Classes:

8. Spanish: I really don't like Mrs. Lederer. She just seems like a really anal retentive person. I will give her this though; unlike Ms. Grande, she does teach Spanish Honors in the Honors class.
7. Sports Marketing: Too many jocks. I like Lombo and the easy 100 makes it okay though.
6. Gym: Not a big fan of 2nd period Gym, but have to make due. I have a lot of friends in it though.
5. AP US: Unfortunately it literally is being conducted as a college class, but I'm not sure yet if that's going to be beneficial or not yet. I do like Mr. Henderson though. He is cool as Greenwald said he would be.
4. Pre-Calc: So far the class is really easy. My teacher(whos name I won't try and spell so I don't get it wrong) is really good, both teacherwise and personality.
3. AP Chem: It's only going to get harder, but hopefully Monday I can add to the 100 I have on the test. I like Castellano and sitting near Jwa and Mark.
2. AP English: Although this really looks like the most challenging of my AP classes(at least it feels like it is), I really like it. Whiffen is really great, and I think I'm going to get a great amount out of it.
1. Psychology: Bingo. So glad I got this 1st half. Although Mrs. Emler is a little out there at times, she seems like a great teacher for Psych and I think I will also get a lot out of this class. Who knows, I may have finally narrowed down what I want to do to just two professions.

I really like the way the hair on the back of my neck stands up when I hear James Hetfield begins to sing "So close, no matter how far." Love, its great isn't it?

Feels wierd to say, but I might actually be truly happy, and its not just because of Lexa now. I think I've finally truely embraced the emotion itself, and plan on doing it more often.

Currently Listening to: Metallica - Disposable Heroes

Better Late Then Ever

29 ABs
6 Hits
9 Runs
1 2B
0 3B
0 HR
7 RBI
6 SB
14 BBs
13 K
2 HBP
1 SF
.207/.478/.241
.720 OPS

Overall, a pretty good year. Those BB's are something I really take pride in, because in certain situations, as the old Baseball adage goes, "a walk is better than a hit." Lovin the OBP.

Goals for Next Year(Wherever I Play) :
-Hit at least .280
-Pending the number of AB's, cut down on K's
-Hit a Triple
-Make a maximum of 2 errors(Physical, not mental)
-Have 2 Outfield assists
-Steal 5+ bases
-Lay down a good bunt

Nice Bonus':
-Hit a Homerun
-Steal 3rd twice

I'll be back to check these off in the Spring or Summer.

Currently Listening To: Metallica - Hero of The Day

P.S: I really love Lexa a lot. She is amazing, and I hope she cherishes that special thing I do when it happens in...I believe the countdown to that is 4 days now :).

No Nothing Else Matters

Reasons Why the Past Four Days Have Been Perfect:

1. Although I am not happy that I was the only true happy part of her Birthday, I am glad I could give her a day to remember and bring a smile to that beautiful face. The letter accomplished it's goal. Part I may have been something, but she will ball her eyes out when part II comes around November 27th or 28th.
2. I gave her almost an equally happy day yesterday. I really do enjoy bringing enjoyment to her life. That cake, like the letter, was made from the heart.
3. Witnessing Baseball History. It really couldn't happen to a better guy. Pending any steroid allegations or controversy(which now-a-days any athlete is susceptible to), Derek Jeter is and should be a role model to others.
4. School has been going great. This is my year. Last year isn't going to compare to this one. So far everything has been going right, and I feel more confident than ever. Cheers to a really successful school year.
5. I can't wait to get my acoustic guitar. I really do plan on carrying this out and playing it. It's going to be so much fun.

Things I Have Done and Need to Get Done:

1. AP US - Done
2. Read the rest of Rise to Rebellion - will be done today
3. Read Article and anote it for English - try to start today
4. Do AP questions - try and do some today, if not, do it Monday
5. Find binder for Spanish to use for 100 - Done
6. Figure out when to talk to Mr. Ward - Done, doing it tomorrow

Currently Listening To: Metallica - Am I Evil?

Closer

This day is one a lot of kids dread, the day before school. I on the other hand, am embracing it with open arms. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed summer and being home and playing baseball and all of it. But there comes a time when you just get bored of being on vacation, and want to get back into the swing of school buses, lockers, binders, and teachers. I personally just can't wait. This year is going to be the best yet. I thought my sophomore year was good, bringing me Lexa and great grades, but I plan on making it even better. It'll be my first full year of embracing who I am and letting that person shine.

This morning I began "the surprise." This is going to be so fun. I really hope she likes it. I'm taking the definition of from the heart and elaborating and expanding it beyond what I've done for her the first 9+ months of this relationship. It's her 16th birthday, and you only have one of those once, so I'm gonna do the best I can to make it memorable for this beautiful and amazing girl that is in my life.

Also, that When Metallica Ruled The World special I watched this morning, wasn't half bad.

Currently Listening to: Blink 182 - I Miss You

Top 10 Metallica Songs and Reasons Why

10. The Unforgiven II(ReLoad) - I just think this song is beautiful. James' vocals are what set the whole calming mood of the song. Its quite interesting to listen to the evolution of a voice, by aging and developing sound equipment. From the screaming young teenager, to the mature adult, James Hetfield really demonstrates how great his voice truly is.
9. The Unforgiven(Black Album) - It begins the trilogy that has lasted 18 years. It begins the quest for forgiveness. It begins with being under control, and how many people seem to control you early in life. Obviously, I can relate greatly, as my life hasn't exactly been about freedom. Just a beautiful song, and probably one of a few songs I will listen to with a trumpet in it.
8. The Thing That Should Not Be(Master of Puppets) - Great song. Never would have guessed it was about the Lochness monster until I saw on a website. The intro is really cool and sets the tone for the story of this "thing that should not be." On a lesser note, regardless if it was on Easy, the first song I ever 100% on Guitar Hero.
7. Master of Puppets(Self explanatory what album, but Master of Puppets) - The definition of a good speed-metal song. Any Metallica fan has gotta love this song. Makes me never want to do drugs. Even a song like this paints a pictures and tells quite the good story. Lets see if we could ever learn even a part of this song.
6. Enter Sandman(Black Album) - What's left to say about this song. We've written so much about it, and have even given that description to a Yankee Advisor(Which I doubt got to Mo, but oh well.) Still to me the first Metallica song I ever liked.
5. Welcome Home(Sanitarium)(Master of Puppets) - Great song to hear when you want to be alone. Was supposed to be the "next Fade to Black" supposedly by other sites and just places I've seen. I can see why by the tone of the guitar and the mood it sets, but its no Fade to Black. It's its own song, that really gives good insight to what it feels like to be in an insane assylum.
4. Fade to Black(Ride the Lightening) - Just a gorgeous ballad. Has been rated up there with Suicide Solution as one of the most influential anti-suicide songs out there. Me personally, other than because I like it, tend to listen to it when I get down. It doesn't necesarily lift spirits all the time, but it does tell you a story of what not to do.
3. One(...And Justice for All) - Has so much meaning behind it. True people who understand music look at it as a gorgeous song and not "garbage" as my mom has described it. The feeling of anti-war, and the was the guitar sounds, its just perfect. The beginning with the sounds of war in the background before the guitar comes in really sets the mood. That Kirk solo ain't too bad either.
2. The Unforgiven III(Death Magnetic) - I admit, at first, when I heard the intro was piano and trumpet, I didn't look into it too much. But after finally giving it a chance, I really understood and related to it greatly. You really can't forgive anyone else until you can forgive yourself. Looks like all 3 of the trilogys make it on my top 10, and to me, the newest the greater of the 3. I still wish I could find a live version of it.
1. Nothing Else Matters(Black Album) - The only terms I can use to explain this song is "Alexandra Danielle Carnelli" and "So close...no matter how far." Just a great song and probably my favorite song ever.

They've Gone Away

By the numbers:

3 - The number of days of summer left.

1 - AP US Assignment left for me to finish.

4 - Days left until the best girlfriend ever's Birthday.

$125 - The price of the aucustic guitar at Guitar Center. I'm really excited to go through with learning guitar. Although I know we won't buy one until Christmas time, I just needed some number to mention my excitement.

13 - Wins left for the Yankees to reach 100. What a great season. I'm sooooo stoked to watch the playoffs this year. Big things are gonna happen, I can feel it. I'm somehow buying a 2009 World Series Champions shirt if they win it. I bet a lot of people wish they were Mark Teixeira now.

310 - Songs on the Mp3. I need to delete and add stuff though, but I think I'll wait a while to do that. I'm perfectly content with it the way it is now.

27 - Days until Mom's birthday. Where I'm gonna find money for that is beyond me.

6:28 - The length of Nothing Else Matters on my Mp3. So close....no matter how far.

11.26 - A day I'm always going to look forward to.

*A number so large it has no value* - How much deeper I keep falling in love with you.

Currently Listening To: Metallica - Nothing Else Matters

Dog Days Are No More

As the dog days of August appear to have faded away, I find myself feeling really good. I still feel aftershocks of whatever wisdom passed through me yesterday and had me feeling really intelligent. Chapter 3 of Lies wasn't up to par with the first 2. All the information for the most part was things that although I didn't know, could see happening. The only really cool thing I did learn was that Squanto had been a slave and been to Europe before meeting the Pilgrims.

Tomorrow I get to formulate my analysis of the first 3 hapters of Lies. I'm actually looking forward to it, as the book really is opening my eyes. It's showing me that don't always believe what you're told. Sometimes things aren't as they should be. Thinking about it, I already love my US teacher. He wants us to formulate our own opinion on things and have a better understanding of everything that we are being told.

I'm really excited for this surprise I got planned for Lexa. She's gonna love it. It's all going to be from the heart, something I haven't done enough in this relationship. When you're gonna be with someone forever, you should always be like that.

Currently Listening to - Dragonforce - Through the Fire of Flames