And They're Off..

Here is my attempt at making sense of all this shit speeding through my mind at this moment

-I guess all the work I've had with the conclusion of the first quarter has me a tad stressed. I know my grades will be fine, it was just really stressful, and I know the second quarter only gets worse. Oh well, gotta do watcha gotta do I suppose.
-Monday or Tuesday(I honestly forgot and really don't want to remember what day it is), I begin 40 days or so(I also don't remember the sentence) without a male figure in my life. Oh joy.
-I need a job. I have no money and it really sucks. I want to get everyone gifts this Christmas. I'm going hunting today for one. Hopefully all goes well, or at least something.
-With what happened last week, the fear of not wanting to fuck up and lose everything.
-The progress I'm making with the guitar. Its been going great. I can't wait until I have an electric. That's when the true fun begins.
-All this shit with getting the hell out of this place. I so badly want to just pack up and get the fuck out of here, for real. The sooner we leave, the better.
-The Yankees winning. Other than probably November 26th of this year(Hopefully :/) and winning my Baseball Championship, watching that probably made my year. I called it from the beginning of the year and stuck through and endured the long season almost as much as they did. Great job boys, looking forward to seeing you all try and defend that title next year(PS: Please re-sign Damon and Matsui).
-Paranormal Activity. That was a great movie. Definitely the best I've seen this year. I of course, went against the norm of other people and did not find it scary whatsoever.
-Approximately 9 PM to 11 PM last night. It all felt passionate and nice. I really do love her. We're gonna be just all right, I know it. Its all too perfect to not stay that way.
-Getting in shape and doing Baseball things. Its getting harder and harder to do anything Baseball related when you have nobody to do anything with. The sport I love is becoming less and less popular, especially as the fall drags itself into the devil that is winter. Workouts are coming up, but part me doesn't even want to do those. I'm really kind of growing resentful of school sports after hearing about Joe's season. One play all year. It really sucks when you have the heart and determination to do something, but because you're not sucking your coaches dick or whatever you're not good enough to play.

I think that should be a good start.

Currently Listening To: Red Hot Chili Peppers - Dani California.

Thoughts On Poetic Language

Sitting here, listening to music, made me think. How do these groups, bands, rappers, make the choices to put certain words and phrases into their song lyrics? In Mr. Whiffen format: What causes them to make the rhetorical choices they do when it comes to their choice in words? Why does Metallica begin The Unforgiven III with how could he know, this new dark's light, would change his life forever? All these questions, all these wonders, float in my head at times. It is almost philosophical at times. It's these types of thoughts that means my brain is in a good place. I never tend to think about these types of things. I usually would just accept those lyrics as just the way the song begins. But questioning things, that's what seperates the one from the many. And even though I used to tell myself I wanted to be a part of the many, I truly know that I belong apart of the one. I just think its time to start showing that a little bit more often.

Currently Listening to: Metallica - The Unforgiven III(Not completely ironic, as my thought for this entry did stem from Fade to Black.)

All I Have to Say Is...

Blah and I love Fade to Black...And weeks do go slower when you're not in a good mood.

Currently Listening to: Metallica - To Live Is to Die
Mood: Don't fucking ask. I don't have one anymore. I got rid of it because its defective.

Good-bye....Motherfucker

I realized something today while I felt unusually sluggish. It wasn't because I had just ran the mile. It wasn't "oh my god I can't breath" type of tired. It was more "I don't feel like existing" type of tired. I feel depressed. Oh well, now to answer questions about it from Lexa, who by the time she reads this I'll have probably pissed off somehow..

Currently Listening To: Metallica - Fade to Black(Always so appropriate.)

DONE!

The last two days were simply amazing. Spent two days at Jimmy's. Not only was it really goddamn fun, but it was also very reassuring. I'm not gonna lie, I had times where I thought he just said he was my bestfriend and I was the only one who really felt that, but now I know its true. Being a teenager rocks. It took three years into it to finally experience it, but who cares; I'm livin' it up now! Although the football game was boring, overall this was really fun. Lol at that dead bitch, I hope me and Lexa just run into her one day. A good knock to the mouth would be cool.
Also; I officially love Jimmy's parents. They're just so welcoming, and really do show where Jimmy gets his acceptance of everything from(quite paradoxical, but we'll discuss the paradoxical effect of Jimmy's acceptance and niggers another day :p). It was great to sit around the fire with everyone.

Things I Plan on Getting Done
-Spend time with my brother.
-Do sit-ups. Ate a lot the past few days, don't want it to sit there and build up again.
-Watch the Yankees clinch(that would mean they have to win, but facing The Idle, I got a good feeling its a good possibility that's going to happen.).
-Start PSAT test booklet either today or tomorrow.
-Look to see where I can get a good price on hoodies and/or a jacket.
-In the same sense, look to see how much either a black wifebeater is; or a black tanktop; along with some tight black pants. Going for this Halloween.
-With these boxes here, look and find shit that I don't need. (AKA Operation Reduce the Clusterfuck.)
-Keep reading Ballpark Blues. Book is amazing so far.
-Remind Lexa to tune my guitar tomorrow so I can play it again. Also maybe look to get a tuner.
-To remember if anything else needs to be put on this list.

Currently Listening to: Rise Against - Swing Life Away

Great Day

It was a good Saturday. I'm glad I made my mom happy on her birthday. She like my presents :).

Things to do tomorrow:
-AP US Outline
-Learn more of Nothing Else Matters
-(Before that) Learn more chords
-Maybe download some more music?
-Try and get the after school situation for Friday set in stone?
-Like my beautiful girlfriend, try to keep up with sit-ups for the umpteenth time.

Trust I seek, and I find in you. Everyday for us something new. Open mind for a different view. And Nothing Else Matters.

Deep Down Inside I Feel The Scream

I feel content. I'm enjoying this Thursday in which I didn't really have a lot to do. I like those days. I kind of enjoyed my chat with Mrs. Kelly. If there is something I've had trouble with over the years, its talking to former teachers. This year I'm not doing that bad of a job with it. I've already had conversations with Mr. Greenwald, Mrs. Katsionis(That also happened today), Mr. Forti, and Mrs. Kelly. I have to continue this ability to speak to people. It does really get you further in life.

And furthermore...
Fuck this bullshit:
-"I feel like we're gonna have a huge argument"
You only feel something like that if you want it. And that's all I'm gonna say about that load of bullshit.

Closing note: I want a guitar already!

Currently Listening to: Metallica - One