^ Sorry, that was my venting of frustration and snapping as well. I hope this "talk" does something later...:////

Ugh

I REALLY CAN'T STAND THIS SHIT ANYMORE...I REALLY CAN'T. I'M NOT THE PARENTS. IT SHOULDN'T BE UP TO ME OR HER TO FIND OUT HOW SHE CAN GET HOME. IT ISN'T OUR FAULT THAT THEY HAVE NO MONEY TO SPEND FOR A CAB. I really wish I had my own car...or just lived right next to her. I'm really starting to get upset to the point where eventually you're gonna tell me she cannot come over here unless she has a definite way home beforehand...its just not fair...it really isn't....why me?

I fucking hate life.

All this talks of ISP's this morning for NHS and her dance make me upset. I'm going to have no leverage come time for college. I physically can't even do anything. I can't better my chances in life when I have to be home to watch my brother. And as usual, jealously came out in the form of anger this morning when we were discussing it..

Here is too what hopes to be a good weekend.

Juxtaposing

Things to dooooooooooo:

-Finish up English questions. It isn't due until Friday, but why do it tomorrow?
-5:00: bread chicken cutlets for Laura-Lee so we can eat at a good time.
-GUITAR

Not really much on the mind, except sometimes spending the extra 10-15 minutes on homework to double check that its right isn't that bad.

:\

I hate these days when things are dark like this. But sadly, I just had to say everything I said. I love her too much to see her act like that and feel that way. I just can't wait for the day we're on our own together so none of this matters anymore.

How about this blast from the past: Some days wouldn't be special, if it wasn't for rain. Joy wouldn't feel so good, if it wasn't for pain. Death gotta be easy, cause life is hard. It'll leave you physically, mentally, and emotionally scarred.

:/

I still have that really bad feeling in my stomach that her going away this weekend is going to hurt this relationship. Please, PLEASE, let me be wrong..

The Motto Is...

Forgive and forget...

I can't wait to come home today. I can finally have conversations with you again. I really missed you this weekend. It was like....well, Sunday, it literally was like I was single. I didn't talk to you at all yesterday. What happened :(...

Well, heres to a fresh new week, in a fresh new month, in a fresh new semester.