31

As I successfully complete a ratio of 1 blog post per day for the month, I'm alright now. I've honestly just...rerouted the missing of her to where it doesn't bother me anymore. Its most likely(actually, is) not bothering her, so why should I let it get to me then. We're going to go to get some shopping done soon. In a sense, I've had a very relaxed sort of weekend.

Don't think because of what I just said that I don't miss you..

Sunday

Part of me doesn't even want to talk to her today when and if she calls me. Its just not the same. I feel like I'm not even missed. I don't feel loved and I certainly don't feel cared for. Getting one phone call per day the past two days in which she hasn't really said shes missed me or any of that makes me feel very uncared for. Of course I'll probably feel wrong when she gets home Monday morning to read this, which I'm also probably wrong for feeling that was bullshit.

You're probably sitting there right now eating breakfast or talking to her or something. I'm sitting here trying to figure out what I can do to give you the best Valentine's Day you deserve. Try and figure out who's putting more into this..

Well, lets go have a good time. I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.

ASDFGHJKL;'

I'm losing my mind. I never have felt so....lost. This is pathetic. Obviously I'm showing that I need her a lot more than she needs me. I'm pathetic. I can't even go two days without her...

In the end...

its what you sacrafice for the one you love that makes them happy. As much as I hate not seeing you this weekend, you obviously wanted to do this if you didn't even consider anything before telling her yes. So I'll sacrifice a weekend of seeing and talking to you if it keeps that cute smile on your face. I still miss you so much though....it hurts again.

As much as I'd like to be mad right now, I just can't. I miss her too much. I need her to talk to. I need her to hold, to hug, to kiss, to just be with. And I can't do that until next weekend now. Why me? Why do these shitty things always manage to happen to me.

Well, hope you have fun babe....at least one of us will. I just wish you'd call me or talk to me at some point.

It is what it is. She wants to go enjoy her weekend without me, I'll return the favor. I bet you she was told I called and didn't even ask if she could call me. I really don't care at this point now. I'm so pissed that she wouldn't refuse this or put it off that I really have nothing to say.